Dr. Rod Gardin, a licensed mental health counselor based in Valparaiso, Indiana, combines academic excellence and compassionate service in both his professional and community work. A graduate of Purdue University and Indiana Wesleyan University, Dr. Gardin holds advanced degrees in leadership, educational administration, and counseling. In his counseling practice, he provides therapy for individuals and groups dealing with issues such as trauma, grief, addiction, and relationship distress. He has also completed specialized training in acute traumatic incident processing and mental health first aid. Beyond counseling, Dr. Gardin co-leads Butter & Grace, LLC, a food service initiative that feeds local homeless populations. His work reflects a commitment to empathy, wellness, and community care. In this article, Dr. Rod Gardin discusses the importance of premarital psychotherapeutic counseling and how it helps couples build lasting emotional foundations before marriage.
An Introduction to Premarital Psychotherapeutic Counseling for Couples
Couples therapy is a form of therapy intended to help resolve conflicts, improve communication, and enhance the emotional bonds between two people. Therapists provide various kinds of couples therapy, ranging from marriage counseling to premarital counseling.
As the name suggests, premarital counseling involves therapeutic sessions that take place prior to a wedding. Couples may have specific issues they want to work on before marriage, or therapists may help each partner prepare for some of the relationship changes and difficulties that occur following marriage.
Before reaching out to a therapist trained in premarital counseling, couples should understand that couples therapy is not solely intended for couples in crisis. While some people might view couples therapy as a last attempt to save a failing relationship, therapy is a valuable tool that can enhance the quality of any relationship, allowing both partners to lead happier, more fulfilling lives. By starting couples therapy before marriage, couples increase their chances of enjoying long-term satisfaction in their marriage.
As mentioned, couples can begin counseling at any point in their relationships. A therapist working with partners who have not yet discussed marriage will implement different strategies compared to therapists providing premarital counseling. While couples may have specific issues or concerns they want to address, the general approach involves strengthening the emotional connection before marriage.
That said, many of the strategies that therapists implement during premarital counseling can benefit all couples. For example, premarital counseling sessions often involve discussions about sensitive topics, such as shared finances. Whether a couple is in the dating stage, planning a wedding, or already married, the ability to openly discuss finances is critical; a 2021 study found that finances represented the biggest source of conflict for 40 percent of couples in long-term relationships, while numerous studies have found that financial disagreements and unwise spending often contribute to divorce.
Therapists can also guide couples through complex discussions about emotional availability and related issues of intimacy. The National Institutes of Health uses the term “emotional divorce” to describe marriages that end as a result of one or both partners failing to express their feelings. Withholding emotions is comparable to stonewalling, one of the leading causes of communication breakdowns. A lack of intimacy also contributes to the dissolution of many marriages.
Premarital counseling can prove critically important for couples who feel stressed while planning their wedding and related activities. A 2023 survey that polled 4,000 couples found that 52 percent of couples experienced stress during wedding planning. Nearly 60 percent described the process as “overwhelming,” compared to just 6 percent who described the process as not stressful. Couples therapists not only help engaged couples navigate common stressors during wedding planning, but also help remind couples why they decided to get married in the first place and prevent that stress from impacting communications and intimacy.
Regardless of any specific needs couples may express, therapists usually explore a few key behaviors during premarital counseling sessions. For instance, therapists often identify and explore emotional habits that may negatively impact the couple’s emotional bond before and after marriage, like one or both partners’ tendency to avoid conflict or shut down during hard conversations.
Therapists can also support couples as they discuss career goals, parenting styles, differing thoughts on religion, and how to communicate with extended family. Above all, couples therapists strive to remind partners that counseling is not a red flag, but rather another emotional investment each partner is making in the other.
About Rod Gardin
Dr. Rod Gardin is a licensed mental health counselor and community advocate based in Valparaiso, Indiana. He provides therapy for individuals and couples addressing issues such as anxiety, grief, and trauma. A graduate of Purdue University and Indiana Wesleyan University, Dr. Gardin is also trained in critical incident desensitization, acute trauma processing, and mental health first aid. In addition to his counseling practice, he co-leads Butter & Grace, LLC, a food trailer initiative that supports the local homeless community through meal programs and outreach.
